To share or not to share...

I have about 0-1 motivation on a scale of 100. The most productive things I have done thus far today were putting water in the Brita pitcher and brushing my cat. My mind has been busy though.

I watch the show "Monk" a lot. If you haven't seen it, it's about a former detective with OCD, a panic disorder, and a load of phobias. I absolutely love it. The love is recent, though I did like the occasional show now and then before. Now I can't get enough. I will literally sit for hours watching the show while doing different things on the computer. It's a complete waste of time, but it feels good.
The reason I love Monk so much is because he's miserable, scared, and intellegent, which are things that I feel I relate to. It's nice to be around someone, even if only on a television show, who is going through something similar to me. When I watch it I feel understood.
I'm beginning to really understand the need for people to be a part of a group that is comprised of people struggling with similar things. I think that it's something I didn't see practiced openly when I was young, but am seeing more and more as an adult. I've attended AA meetings as a part of a previous job, and I understand why people return to them. After the first few meetings, you realize that people really can't judge you because they've been in similar situations.
Why didn't it ever feel like that at church? Being an open person, there wasn't much I did that was not eventually found out by my fellow church goers. I never knew what they were going through though. This wasn't just at church, but in most situations with people I knew; work, community, friends - no one spoke openly about struggling. Everyone said they were "fine" or "OK".
There has to be a balance between telling others too much, and keeping everything to yourself until you break. Right now I have one person who I go to with most things, yet one person isn't enough. I know if I am to be healthy, I need to spread it around a bit. It's scary, I don't know exactly how to do it without going to one or the other extreme, but I am going to take it on.

In the meantime, it seems that I should get up off my ass, and get out of my head. I'm pretty sure I told my sister I would finish the dishes at some point today, so I should probably do that. Maybe I'll even clean the bathroom.